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A Testimony – “Touched by an Angel”

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Have you ever been touched by an angel? I can honestly say since I have grown in my recovery and closer to the Lord, that I have been touched by many angels. I probably won’t be able to name them all but I am going to tell you about some of them.

My first angel, I would have to say, would be my husband, John. God sent him to me when I was living on my own, having a hard time with finances, and wanting to go to school. This man, I had only known for three months, decided to help me with my career. We’ve now been married for ten years.

My other encounter with an angel, I would have to say, would be my two boys. They have been the biggest blessing to me and our home.

Before I was hospitalized last year for attempted suicide and depression, Satan had me believing that the only reason why I was born was to have these two boys and that my work was done here on earth, that I was a terrible mother, wife, and friend. Satan tried to make me believe that the world was a better place without me and that God was calling me home. (I really believed this.)

I was so miserable here on earth that Satan made me believe that God wanted to take my pain away by having me commit suicide. God did want to lift my pain, but not the way Satan had said.

God sent another angel my way, my therapist. She is a Christian and I know God put us together for a reason, although I haven’t figured it out yet, but I know and trust Christ to lead me, and us, in the right direction.

The next angel came while I was in the hospital. Dr. M. has been a blessing since day one. She and my therapist have well gone above and beyond the call of duty in the therapist and patient relationship. Dr. M. has spent many nights with me late in her office and my therapist has spent her week-ends on the phone with me to help me through some rough times.

I don’t think people realize the impact that sexual abuse has on a person. You are robbed of your childhood, you have a lousy relationship with your parents, and in my case, family members that don’t believe that someone in my family could do this to me. “I must be making it up.” So I have been trying to function in this world with my family as though nothing had ever happened to me as a child.  Trying to be the perfect wife, mother, friend, a Sunday School teacher, and whatever other duties life has asked me to do. (Does this sound familiar?) Then one day I just broke down and didn’t know why. I just did not want to live any more.

It has taken me over a year to realize that all the people, situations, and places that God has put me in over the past year, that I really am lucky to be here. I have had several suicide attempts. Some really rough week-ends, days just trying to make it through the day. Why? I keep asking God why? And the only reason that I can come up with is that we are all placed here for a reason. We are not to make the decision when our life is to end.

We are not our judges. There is only one and that is God Himself. I don’t have to prove anything to anyone except to me. I am a survivor and I am loved, if not by others, by Jesus Himself. The reason He had for creating me might have been to teach Sunday School for three years and touch a life, or get a job and touch a life, or join a support group and touch a life. Maybe not even to touch a life but change someone’s thinking. Make them smile, give them encouragement when things are not going so well for them. They might not know it but some day they can say they have been touched by an angel.

Because we are all angels in God’s eyes. We were put here on earth to love and care for one another. That is exactly what angels do! And they do it unconditionally without asking anything in return.

I want to thank all the people that God has put in my life. And all the angels He has sent my way. Even though I fought hard to push many people away, thank you Jesus for not giving up on me and for sending more and more angels my way. I know I need all of the help I can get.

I am still very much in recovery. I have a long way to go. I know that I am not alone, that You will be by my side the whole walk and just getting over the hurdle and finding out that there are wonderful people out there wanting to help me, people who love me, support me, and don’t want to hurt me.

Trust is a big issue for anyone who has been abused in any way, shape, or form. The Lord is constantly telling us, over and over again, in the Bible, “Trust in Me and I will lead you to a place of everlasting love and peace.”

The answer is not suicide. That is not our decision to make. The answer is trusting and believing in the Lord Jesus Christ.

My prayer for all who read this: May you find happiness, peace, and love in this life that God has so greatly blessed us with. It may have started out not being so wonderful, but look at it this way, if the first twenty years of your life was terrible, then make the next twenty years the best that they can be.

Touch a life that may need a little encouragement, we are all God’s angels. He is by no means through with us and He has not given up on us. So please don’t give up on you.

Written by Caroline. Angels by Grace – Dec. 1995

~~~~~

Enjoy the comfort in the words of this song.

If you have confidential questions/comments feel free to e-mail me at: elah501c@bellsouth.net

http://www.elahministries.com

http://www.suepen2paper.com

Blessings to you.

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About Sue Cass

I am a follower of Jesus Christ and an abuse survivor. I am the founder & C.E.O. of Elah Ministries, Inc. A non-profit 501c3 ministry that offers hope, healing, and deliverance to hurting souls. I have seen the Grace of God work mightily in both individual lives (mine included) and through the support groups I have led. Elah Ministries, Inc. is supported strictly by donations and the proceeds from the sale of my books. My prayer is that all hurting souls may find God's freedom through His Grace, mercy, and healing. I have also penned six published books, both fiction and non-fiction, hoping to enlighten, uplift, and entertain in a way that honors my Heavenly Father and draws my readers closer to our Lord Jesus Christ. May God bless you with His peace, hope, love, and joy as you follow Jesus Christ.

15 responses »

  1. Ive tried alot of things in my life….Christainity the last….I put everything into that hope….I dont see it as much anymore…its a bunch of promises, follow all the rules and Ill bless you and love you…b.s…more like use you abuse you and discard you…like everything and everyone else…..Im tired of the past, working through issue after issue….just dangle the carrot of hope …but you never reach it…..its not love and mercy to see how much pain and suffering someone can endure untill they snap…I want to die….theres nothing worth staying around for …..nothing!!

    Reply
    • Dear Nessa I am so sorry for the pain that you have had and are still having. I want to encourage you to hang onto the Lord because I know from my own pain in the past that He does care, He does love you, and He will help you through this. I know how frustrating the healing process can be. I felt the same way. “It will never end!” was almost like my mantra. But it does with the Lord’s help and healing. You can’t do it on your own but He is here to help you if you’ll just keep asking and believing. “follow all the rules and I’ll bless you” does not come from the Lord. He says, “come close to Me and I will come close to you.” He won’t force you. It’s your choice. I am praying for you. God bless you.

      Reply
    • Hi Nessa3… I totally understand how you are feeling. I have been there too. But, I want to share something with you. I grew up in church and followed the “rules”. However, it did not stop me from entering an abusive marriage and suffering through various trials in my life. It was only when I realized that “Christianity” really is not about religion and rules. It is truly about having a relationship with Him and freedom to talk to Him like a Friend.. Crying out to Christ when we have nothing left and allowing Him to help us walk through these traumas in our life is a choice that we all have to make. He really does show Himself when we are open to receive. But I can tell you that I was not ready to receive Him till I was devastated. I will share with you a posting that I had written. He never promises that it will be easy. But He does promise that He will never leave us. Many, many blessings to you. I will be praying for you!!

      http://secretangelps911.wordpress.com/2013/05/13/rescued-when-i-did-not-even-know-that-i-needed-it/

      Reply
      • I appreciate the encouragement. And its obviously difficult to expalin everything in this type of a format. My biggest issue with God is at the church I recently left I felt I obeyed God submitted to leadership watched my mouth and waited for Him to defend me instead of me doing it..Prayed, fasted…kept a right attitude in the midst of suffering,when everyone was against me…kept my focus on worshiping Him…I opened up and was vulnerable in ways I have never been…and got screwed…
        so Im not eager to jump back into being open and close to anyone ….I trusted Him for the first time to protect me when I was the most vulnerable….its bad enough when those in the world do it to you….but when those who represent God to it to you. I could go on….but enough said.

      • Good morning Nessa! I really do understand. I have left several churches as God lead me to leave because of “man”. I had scheduled a posting for today but did not remember what it was till I just opened up my blog. This posting today is for you and the many others hurt by religion. God will never hurt us. Man, under the guise of religion/ God, will hurt us. We can only truly trust God. As we seek Him with spirit and soul, He will guide us, even leading us out of “churches” into communion with Him only as we trust Him. He will then lead us where He wants us. He truly wants a personal relationship with us… not through man. I will continue to be praying for you. May God pour out His blessings on you and your family!

      • Hi Nessa: I have been sent, by the Lord, to several different churches of different denominations and it really saddens me to see how professed Christians treat each other. In Christ there is no condemnation but boy there sure is with humans! I had to determine that my relationship with our Lord and Savior was not/will not be determined by what man does. Jesus wants a relationship with us and He does not condone mistreatment by others. He says to give our burdens to Him and believe me, I do! I’m so sorry you have been treated badly within the body of Christ. The Lord will deal with them and their attitudes as He will deal with us and our attitudes. Don’t let a bunch of “holier than thou” church people drive you away from the One that truly loves you and cares about every little detail of your life. There are those who are truly Christ followers, not just “yeah, I’m a Christian pew warmers.” I’m so glad you joined this group and are able to share some of your pain. You are in our prayers. There are many that have been where you have been. We feel your pain and we know that Christ will bring you through it and you’ll be stronger for it. You may not think that now but its true. Blessings to you Nessa.

      • thank you for your prayers.
        Blogs like this help to vent, I feel I can be honest about my struggles…and still have some protection from the hypocrites.

      • That is one of the reasons this group was started and I’m thrilled you feel free enough to be able to “vent” or just share your struggles. We’re with you Nessa. Just stay strong in the Lord. I know, that’s not always easy.

  2. This was wonderful! Thank you for sharing. I loved the song and sang every word such a blessing at the end of today. God bless jacqui xx

    Reply
  3. A powerful and touching message, Sue. ❤

    Reply

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